It’s often said we have a habit of donning rose-tinted glasses when looking back. But, could indulging in a bit of nostalgia be good for us sometimes?
Denise van Outen loves blasting out Nineties classics in her DJ sets – and it makes sense.
“I think a lot of music from then has really stood the test of time, and I guess a lot of people that were out partying in the Nineties, we are at an age now where perhaps we’ve had kids and started families – and you reminisce about the time when you were young, free and single and just having a really good time.
“There was also a lot of really fun TV then. It was a real decade of just a lot of fun,” says the Essex-born actress, singer and Celebrity Gogglebox star, who also got her TV big break in the Nineties presenting Channel 4’s seminal morning entertainment show, The Big Breakfast.
But it wasn’t just the entertainment of the time that was different. This was also the tail-end of the pre-smartphones era, so being ‘in the moment’ came a lot more easily.
“We never had access to everything on our smartphone. So, you’d go out and you’d just be in the moment and really enjoy it,” says van Outen, who turned 50 in May and shares 14-year-old daughter, Betsy, with her ex-husband Lee Mead.
“I remember going to the big festivals like Glastonbury and Reading and you wouldn’t have your phone with you, you wouldn’t be videoing anything. You’d just be enjoying it. I think that’s why people have a lot of fond memories of that time.”
She accepts social media is part and parcel of her job, but is conscious of how she engages with it.
“Obviously the industry I’m in, there is a requirement for it, and I enjoy it, but I use it in a positive way. I don’t actually read a lot of the comments – you know, if you get trolled and things like that, I just never take any notice of it.
“I think because I had the luxury of growing up without it, I’m not that bothered by it. It doesn’t mean anything to me if I’ve got a certain amount of likes, or if I haven’t, I don’t care. But I can see how it affects younger people.
“And I think we’re gradually getting to a stage where a lot of people, [for example] if you’re going to a party, they’re putting on invites that it’s a ‘no phone policy’. I think people are starting to see now that they [smartphones] can be a hindrance and stop people actually enjoying themselves,” she adds.
In her early teens when she started landing TV and theatre roles, van Outen, who attended the Sylvia Young Theatre School, has always cherished music – whether starring in the likes of musical theatre hits Chicago and Legally Blonde, hosting radio shows, or now DJing.
Those fun, nostalgic vibes are still a big influence. Earlier this summer, she released a dance single called Discoliscious – van Outen also co-runs a DJ and events agency of the same name with fellow presenter/DJ/actress Jemma Bolt – and recently headlined a rave special for The Crystal Maze Live Experience in London.
“It’s a night of pure fun and nostalgia,” she says of the immersive experience based on the iconic TV gameshow. “It’s good to do with your friends, because you can just have a real laugh.”
With stress and burnout rates higher than ever, she believes we shouldn’t underestimate the power of letting loose to music.
“We’ve all got memories attached to a lot of songs too,” she reflects. “I had this conversation the other day with a friend, about The Shapeshifters’ song, Lola’s Theme. My friend was like, ‘Oh, that always reminds me of such a special time in my life, it was when I met my husband’.
“I think that’s also why music feels special to me, because it reminds me of all these times… it just gives people a little bit of escapism.”
She is happy her nights out aren’t really on the wild side anymore, though.
“I love the fact that I go out now and when I DJ, I don’t party, I’m watching everybody else partying. I get a buzz from playing the music, but I’m not out having a wild time like maybe I did when I was younger.”
As for self-care in midlife, she says: “The main thing for me is just finding a balance and making sure that you enjoy time away from work, as well as enjoying your work. I think that’s really important. Taking time out and finding hobbies and doing things that are perhaps a little bit different.”
For van Outen, this has turned out to be golf, which she took up after turning 40. “That’s something I was never, ever expecting to come into my life,” she admits. “But I really enjoy it and I’ve made lots of great friends from playing golf.”
It all started after a friend invited her along to watch a charity tournament.
“And I’d been thinking about taking up a new hobby – I thought, I want something new that challenges me a little bit,” van Outen recalls. “And she was like, ‘We’ll all club together and get you a set of golf clubs if you promise to have lessons’. And they did get me the golf clubs, and I thought, well if I don’t take up lessons now I’ll feel really bad!”
So, she booked a couple of sessions thinking that would be it. But she was instantly hooked. “I ended up having 10 lessons in the first week!” van Outen laughs.
“I can’t play as much as I’d like to, because it is a time-consuming game to play a full round and also I’m a mum. But if I’ve got a Sunday on my own and my daughter’s at her dad’s, I’ll go then.
“I love it. I switch off, I don’t have to think about work or anything else, the pressures of life, and it’s good because it keeps you outdoors. So, a game that I thought was really boring when I was younger, I can now see the appeal!”
Another recent change for the former radio host is her daughter becoming a teenager. When it comes to the advice she hopes to pass on to Betsy however, or any girls and young women thinking about navigating their own path in life, van Outen is clear: “I keep saying to my daughter, it’s just so important to love what you do.
“I think they feel a lot of pressure, teenagers. You start having this panic about what you’re going to do and leaving school. And I’m like, as long as you do something you’re passionate about and you enjoy, that’s 100% the main thing. Because you want to get up and go to a job that you love. Not give yourself a load of stress and anxiety because you hate your job.
“I’ve had friends that have done something for years and then said, ‘I never really liked it’. Then they’ve switched and tried something new, and they’ve flourished in it, because they were enjoying it more.”
Tickets for The Crystal Maze LIVE Experience in London and Manchester are on sale now until October, 2024. Visit the-crystal-maze.com
